Thu 2-19-2009 The Way We Was

Thu 2-19-2009 The Way We Was

Everybody believes that the pivotal moments in their childhood or life are remembered the same way by the other people who were there. This is almost never the case. The reality is that these moments were only pivotal and defining in your own experience. They barely remember that they even happened. Their minds were elsewhere, thinking about things you never knew about or even thought of.

The kid who picked on you at summer camp and the pack of hyenas that made your high school years miserable have no recollection of those events. They were dwelling on the traumas and neuroses that turned them into such dicks in the first place. They had an alcoholic mother or abusive father, or maybe a crazy uncle who bought them lingerie or gay porn when they were 8 years old. These are their pivotal moments which haunt their existence on a daily basis. For some, the root causes are not as dramatic as this, but it’s always something if you dig down deep enough to the core problem.

Compared to their defining moments, yours are non-starters, not even in the same league. Don’t hold it against them. You are both different people than you were then, and this past that haunts you also molded you into who you are today. If there are any parts of yourself that have redeeming qualities, you might even owe them a thank you in a twisted sort of way.
Their act of being an asshole to you those many years ago turned you into a better, stronger version of yourself.

Good or bad, most experiences happen for a reason, and it takes time to figure it out. The stones in your shoes eventually become part of the path you travel down each and every day on the way to wherever it is you are going! Those stones become your foundation, the building blocks of your resolve that things will change – and that your life will be different.