Sat 5-23-2009 He’s Got an Anus Problem!

Sat 5-23-2009 He’s Got an Anus Problem!

My friend Ted from Chicago is a real character. Things are always happening to him that don’t seem to happen to anyone else. He took his dog to the vet one day and there was an old Jewish lady there with a poodle, which Ted was bending over to pet. As he was doing this, another lady was asking poodle lady what was ailing her little doggie. She says, “He’s got an anus problem”, then looked in Ted’s direction, who was still bent over with his ass in the air. Everyone in the waiting also looked that way and studied Ted, presumably to determine what he might have done to earn himself an anus problem. Ted just stood there like a deer in the headlights and blushed various shades of red.
Another time, Ted was doing a painting job for a lipstick lesbian couple who lived downtown. They were a very attractive couple, which everyone knows is the exception, not the rule. So at one point, he was taking a break and was sitting on their bed. He started thinking about all the erotic action their bed had seen over the years and stored up enough masturbatory fodder for the next couple of years.